You can bet that whenever someone prefaces something with "No offense, but...." you will be offended.
Two NFL quarterbacks currently garnering much excitement over their return to the game are Michael Vick and Tom Brady. Vick is just out of jail and has been reinstated by the league, but is still searching for a team. Brady missed all of last season with a knee injury and is expected to lead the New England Patriots to the playoffs. Vick is the object of universal scorn while Brady is loved. But what Tom Brady did in dumping his pregnant girlfriend is worse than what Michael Vick did with running his dogfighting ring.
I recently discovered that Phoenix has a large system of canals and washes, and many of them have bike paths and parks alongside of them. I was able to ride more than 30 miles without having to cross a major street. I have always thought of the desert as pretty ugly, but most of the time I ride along this bike path system, the scenery is very nice.
The federal government recently gave us the Cash for Clunkers program, stating that the money would last for several months. It ran out in three days. The CFC deal was a whole lot simpler than most, yet they miscalculated the cost by a factor of a jillion. This does not give me a warm, fuzzy feeling about their ability to address much more complex programs like ObamaCare. Speaking of which, what do you want to bet that the ObamaCare plan will have mandatory benefits for same-sex couples, creating conflict with states that want to ban same-sex marriage?
If the Sham Wow guy tells me that my second set is "Absolutely Free!!!" but then tells me that I have to pay for shipping and processing, how can it be "absolutely" (as in: in all ways) free?!?!
I don't get it when people say that they are going to give 110% effort. It is physically impossible to give more than 100%. I suspect that what they are really saying is "I have been claiming to give 100% up to now, but I have really been dogging it. So now I'll give more like 95% or 98% and call it 110%." They remind me of Mr. Scott from Star Trek. He was the ultimate slacker. Whenever the Enterprise was in a jam, Kirk would call down to Engineering and tell Scotty "I need more power!" Mr. Scott's first response was always and without fail "I can't do it Captain!" (actually it was more "Ah cahn't dew eet Cap'in" either because he's Scottish or intoxicated. It's hard for me to tell the accents apart.) Then Kirk (who never believed what Scotty had to say) would demand "Do it!!!" Scotty (who was trying to tell us that he was already giving 110%) would try to thwart Kirk by going nuclear: "If I do it, the ship will BLOW UP!!!" Kirk would always call Scotty's bluff and demand that he follow orders and do whatever it was that he should have been doing in the first place. And guess what? The Enterprise never, ever blew up even though Scotty said it would. If the Fat Kid were captain of the Enterprise, Mr. Scoot would be marooned on some Klingon prison planet.
The people on Gilligan's Island sure did pack a lot of changes of clothes for a three hour tour, didn't they? And for a desert isle, they got an awful lot of visitors. And the professor could build a radio out of coconuts but could find a way to patch a hole in the boat? Are you kidding me?!? Maybe he was like Sawyer from "Lost" and didn't want to be found. Come to think of it, Ginger and Mrs. Howell packed the most clothes. Maybe they were in on it with the Professor.
